Why Did the Chocobo Cross the Road?

[guiltyred]

Title: Why Did the Chocobo Cross the Road?
Challenge: Characters in a Film
The Film: Stripes
Characters: Crisis Core-era SOLDIER
Team: SOLDIER
Word Count: 100
A/N: Adapted and reposted from an old IJ prompt, as I love these too much to let them gather dust.
 

Sephiroth hated these events. He stood at attention, acknowledging the young troopers as they marched by in formation, their every move neat, precise, and mind-numbingly predictable.

As the last platoon passed, he frowned, mental count off by one. Sephiroth turned toward Lazard and stage-whispered, “That’s not all, is it?”

Lazard fidgeted with his cravat. “Well, General, there’s been some trouble with –”

With great noise, the missing platoon double-time marched across the field, bypassing the parade route entirely.

Their leader called them to their places: “Platoon – a-one, two…”

“BOOM shaka-laka-laka! BOOM shaka-laka-laka! BOOM shaka-laka-laka! BOOM!”

Sephiroth stared. “That was random.”




Title: To Get From the Left to the Right!
Challenge: Characters in a Film
The Film: Stripes
Characters: Crisis Core-era SOLDIER
Team: SOLDIER
Word Count: 100


General Sephiroth regarded the ragtag platoon. No drill sergeant in sight, the troopers seemed to be following a 3^rd Class SOLDIER. After a sidelong glance to Director Lazard, Sephiroth addressed the platoon’s erstwhile leader. “Where the hell have you been, SOLDIER?”

The young man didn’t hesitate. “Training, Sir!”

“TRAINING SIR!” echoed the platoon with eardrum-bursting volume.

I know I’m going to regret this, Sephiroth thought. “What kind of training, son?”

Taking a deep breath, the SOLDIER bellowed, “HOAARRRMMYY TRAINING, SIR!”

“ARMY TRAINING SIR!”

Beside Sephiroth, Angeal hid his face in his hands.

Sephiroth sighed. “Let me guess – that’s Mr. Fair?”

Comments

[guiltyred]

I'm glad I thawed 'em out, then! ^___^